This observation from Abe Morgentaler, director of Men's Health Boston, which specializes in
sexual and reproductive problems, when interviewed by the Wall Street Journal for an article on what it takes to rekindle a sexual spark:
"If there was one thing I could say to every female partner of the guys I
see in my office, it's this: 'Let the man be the man in at least one
area of the relationship, instead of always telling him what he's doing
wrong.' Men need to feel powerful to feel sexy."
I think that goes both ways. The first 5 years of my marriage my husband would randomly poke areas of my belly, arm, or thigh and would look at me like—“are you gonna work on that?” He would also hide food HE didn’t think I should eat. Or the famous comment “your going back for seconds?!?!?” He did all for his concern of “my health and well being”. Then wondered why we didn’t have sex 3 times a week?
WOW!! I THINK I’M A DOCTOR! NOW LETS SEE IF I CAN TOP THAT ONE!! “IT TAKES TWO,AND ITS CALLED LOVE! YOU NEVER SAY ANYTHING IN BED TO OFFEND THE OTHER! YOU ALWAYS ASK,DOES THIS FEEL GOOD,WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO TRY SOMETHING EALSE? DIFFERENT POSITION? SLOW DOWN? GO FASTER ECT:YOU ALWAYS TRY TO PLEASE THE OTHER PERSON AND EVERYTHING WILL BE PERFECT!!LOVE IS NOT RUDE,IS NOT SELF-SEEKING,LOVE IS PATIENT,LOVE IS KIND,LOVE PROTECTS,TRUSTS,HOPES,PERSERVERES,LOVE NEVER FAILS! DOCTOR BILL IN TEXAS!!! HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!!
Since when did men need to “feel sexy”? What a load of crap.
This snippet, originally from the Wall Street Journal article, is so incredibly misleading!
I have just read the original article. It seems this post is meant to make a PERSONAL point. Now i’m questioning your validity, SportsGeezer.
Did the author of the article happen to know my “ex” as that shoe seems to be the right size.
Of course it goes both ways and it does take two to tango or to fight although one doing all he or she can do to emotionally beat up the other can eventually ruin it for both.
The biggest problem is probably a lack of communication skills so that talking become verbal battle and/or physical battle told by the track of emtoinal scars.
Single and celebiate just keeps getting better and better…smile
BELIEVE IT OR NOT … I DO!!! These same words came out of my husbands mouth just days ago! I asked him if he was upset with me about anything(cause he hadn’t made any attempt for sexual pleasure in the last week!)Any ways, his response was “No, I’m not upset with you, I just don’t want to be near you because you’ve been complaining about everything and everybody lately” … then he added … “IT JUST TURNS ME OFF!!!”
This article actually confirmed what I’ve experienced! … It’s not about whats FAIR in a relationship … It’s an actual FACT! The FACT that a partner is constantly complaining or gripe-ing about something must produce unpleasant fumes instead of sexy pheromones? I’m going to focus more on changing my attitude if it will cause my husband of 28 yrs. to adore me more… Life is too short for my “unhealthy attitude” to rob ME!
P.S. and if readers need anymore confirmation just re-watch the July 5th interview of Jake and Vienna! His very words were … “she makes me feel I can never do anything right” She pouts, she undermines me, SHE DOESN’T SUPPORT ME ANYMORE!
What it takes to keep a relationship is the same attitue and motives that attracted him or her in the 1st place! Start changing and so will his desire for you!
LADIES … it may not be FAIR, but the FACT IS… if you will show your man R E S P E C T he will give you the LOVE you desire! Much TRUTH in this article!!!
You know if you would not use CAPITALS for your entire post, I may have read it….Loose the CAPS……
You are completely right. Just last year my husband and I kind of went through the same thing. My husband was not feeling attracted to me any longer because of my constant mood swings and always criticizing him although I was not sure why I had started acting this way toward him I made sure I found out. In my case it was my hormone levels were non exsistant. Once the Dr. took care of that I was on the road to being my old self again and my husband could not believe the change. I have to say that I think men also need to speak up and let us women know what they are feeling at all times instead of waiting for us to confront them. Thankfully our marriage is in a much better place now and we couldn’t be happier. 🙂
“Let the man be the man”? What the hell does that mean? When women don’t like to be criticized, is it “Let the woman be the woman”? What a bunch of baloney.
The formula for general success is simple if you take into account the ‘Currency’ which each gender values most: Men value RESPECT and Women value UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE and LOVE. It’s really that simple. Each gender needs to give the other what they need and things tend to go smoothly. Also … focus on your (common) goals instead of concentrating on what’s wrong … your unconscious mind tend to manifest those things which we focus on the most … so make it goals and not problems.
Men, unconditionally accept and love your wives, Women control your mouth and respect your men.
Right on! Sing it ChiJoe!
All of you have contributed in your interpretation of this article. Albeit, like so many other articles, everyone tends to take input or advice as literal. Take the info mold it to your situation, use what ever applies to yourself and dont be concerned about what doesnt apply.