Among the many minefields of marriage, few have a higher mortality rate than conversations about losing weight, as is “you need to lose some, honey” Wrong again. Now come researchers from something called The Relationship Institute at UCLA who have applied their research –watching thousands of hours of video recordings of married couples talking with each other about their health–, to a how-to book on expeditions to that perilous domain. “Love Me Slender: How Smart Couples Team Up to Lose Weight, Exercise More, and Stay Healthy Together” (Touchstone/Simon & Schuster), by Thomas Bradbury and Benjamin Karney, describes the behaviors of couples who managed to have “the conversation” without damage. Or at least with minimal damage. A UCLA news release quotes Bradbury reporting that the surviving couples say thing like “I love you and that’s not going to change, but I’m going to help you stay healthy and lose weight. We’ll work on this together.” If you can’t remember that, it’s in the book.